It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
only if we run a train.
done.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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