Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
