Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
