They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
my shit smells like andre
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
Randomize
