It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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