I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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