Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
