we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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