paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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