My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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