Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
