Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
