Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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