i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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