I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I need to align my fucking chakras
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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