I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
