She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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