is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I need help removing her.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
