Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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