The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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