The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
