ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
