i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
i drank out of a bidet.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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