I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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