So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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