my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
