i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
