i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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