I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
