i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
