Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
