Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
