she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
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