never play flip cup with pint glasses
Farmville is her only friend.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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