How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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