I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize