Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
