So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize