My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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