I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
