I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
