he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
