I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
