this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
