i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Randomize
