we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
