We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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