It's like God shit irony all over that family
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
