Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
