Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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