i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
