remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
