also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize
